happy wednesday you beautiful people you. we have spent a lot of time discussing how determination and perseverance help us achieve our goals. while sticking to a solid consistent routine and replacing old habits with better ones are important, there is a HUGE, astronomical piece, that i have yet to address; when we aren’t where we want to be. it’s nice thinking that we will always be motivated and power through our dreams with ease, but what happens when we complete a project that we aren’t as in love with as we hoped? or what if we aren’t as productive today as planned because we got caught up on a new Netflix series that we just had to see how it ends? or what if you are feeling behind in life because everyone seems to be doing more than you whether that means they are accomplishing more, traveling more, dating, engaged, married, or having children?

well,, for starters

we need to give ourselves grace.

it is okay to mess up, start over, and even scratch ideas. everything we set out to do will not be a success… at least right away. can it be a success? of course! but chances are you (and me and everyone else) will experience failures time and time again. sure social media doesn’t typically portray this side of our lives, but ask anyone and they are sure to have faced some trailing times of their own. what is awesome though about failure is that we truly do learn from it. it is in our failures where we grow the most so embrace them, learn, and keep growing.

it is also okay to take rest days whether that means physically or mentally or both. when we are well taken care of and healthy we are all around better humans to put it simply. we are better children, siblings, friends, workers, etc.

it too is okay not to be experiencing the same things as your peers. there is not a specific age where you must be dating, getting engaged, married, buying a house, or even having kids by. our journeys are all going to look a bit different so just keep doing you and taking the days as they come. those things will all happen at some point and time if you so choose. if not that then is okay too. remember this is your life, not anyone else’s.

all that is easier said than done though right?

i personally struggle with this. from as long as i can remember nearly everything i did had to be perfect and if it wasn’t i would focus on it and redo it until it was. even seemingly small things like if the alignment wasn’t just right or the font was too small could potentially frustrate me. not to mention comments that weren’t praise turned into remarks where i was seemingly falling short. other times i would over analysis situations; replaying conversations in my head, going over where i should and should not have said things. regardless what it was if i wasn’t where i wanted to be i would beat myself up about; sometimes through negative self talk and other times because i was frustrated at how frustrated it made me. i have indeed made improvements over the years, but there are still plenty of times where it feels i can’t do anything right and i am sure i am not alone in this thought.

this idea of “getting it right” is so unachievable though and it is sad that so many women and men struggle with it. we can really be our own worst enemy. i mean, what really is right? your right and my right might be completely different.. and maybe they aren’t, but regardless there are just about 7.6 billion people around the world. 7.6 billion people. that is a lot of people meaning there are a lot of different ideas of what is right. heck, even if somehow everyone shared one idea what is more important is that whatever you do you should be enjoying it. living your life to the kindest, fullest, and happiest version of yourself.

for at least 13 years i let myself believe to some extent that i was not good enough, but i know despite the lies i have heard and even have made up myself i am a worthy child of god. only recently have i laid this out before god; praying that i can give myself grace. praying daily that i can see myself as god sees me; in his divine image. he sees you too and you are so worthy and so loved. yes, even when it doesn’t feel it.

give yourself grace and love. we are all doing the best we can with the best we have. just as that goes for other people we encounter too. be gentle, kind, loving, and giving of grace just as god does to us.

“may god give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of god and jesus our lord.” - 2 Peter 1:2